Catagory: Im not sure, maybe a story? Will someone PLEASE explain this stuff to me, please?
Rating: NC-17, I guess, or maybe PG, but really theres noting to bad in it but some swear words, exept sex but thats not bad. Well, lets just say its NC-17.
Oh, yeah, it is SLASH, though, so if you dont like that kinda stuff, or if your to young (like my little brother, I wouldnt want him to read this, becuse it might mess up his mind or my mom might see it and be real mad at me for scarring the little brat, but I really think its good - slash, that is, and your just narrow-minded if you dont like it A LOT), go away right now!!!!!
Spoilers: that show, I think it was the first one this season. (??) Mulder's hair looked really good in it, exept in that one scene.
But this is how I would like that scene to have been, if I had written it.
FEEDBACK, PLEASE! to Griffie, I luv to have people write me, but no one does. But dont tell me anything bad, okay? I just wrote this real fast cuz Im trying to get over writers block, its been going on a long time, like forever, you wouldnt believe, and I hoped this would help me to get over it. So tell me that you all like it, and dont say anything if you dont like it, Okay? Thats mean. Its not my fault that I cant spell too good. So NO FLAMES OR BAD LETTERS! I'll use your nasty flames to burn your breakfast toast with! HA HA HA!
Archive: *Only* at the Badfic archive, please, if you want too.
Disclaimer: I wish I was CC because if I was him I'd be really rich and be able to jump Mulder any time I wanted to, and then ask him to go surfing and make him wear those red swimpants, because if he didnt I'd fire him. Exept Mulders a fictional character, but he is cute so I'd jump him anyways, I dont care if he is married, because thats DD, right? Mulders not married, except in shiper storys, to Scully, that I never read. So Dont sue me, because that would be stupid because then you could have all the money I owe to the bank, and my dog would not have anything to eat and that would be mean. Because I'm a fan, so you should be nice to me! And to my dog who watches X-Files too, exept hes mad you killed Scullys dog.
ok, I'll start writing now.
And tell me if you want me to finish it. OK? And I might write more in a sequel. Give me ideas if you want.
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Special Agent Fox Mulder, who was a FBI agent and everybody called him "Spooky" Mulder (because he believed in Spooky things), walked into the room. He had to open the door first, because it was closed, and before he went in to the room he was really scarred because they were probably going to fire him or something like that.
After he opened the door and went inside, wearing a bad, ugly, colorful tie with aliens on it, everybody in the show was there, exept the ones that had died in the last two seasons, like his dad (who I bet hit him a lot when he was a kid). Scully, his boss Walter Skinner, a pinch-faced-looking woman, and Blevins his old boss and head of the FBI, was there, but Cancerman wasnt there. Cancerman, also known as CSM, was at his apartment looking at a picture of Fox and his sister, but Mulder didnt know that when he walked into the room with all the people there looking scarred.
Everyone put their eyes on Mulder. "Oh, Mulder looks so fuckable and HOT right now" Skinner, his boss, and Scully, who was his partner, both thought at the same time. Both were in love with him, but Mulder only cared about The Truth, so he had never slept with neither of them. Well, he had slept with Skinner a few times. You see, he was bisexual, and really did like sex a lot because he watched X-rated movies on tape all the time.
"Mister Mulder, your late!!!" Blevins, Director of the FBI bureau, said, not really yelling, but you could tell he was pretty mad. Blevins thought Mulder was really hot, too, even though he was old. Blevins was about 50 or 70 years old, but he had a HUGE hard on as soon as he saw Mulder, because he was so hot-looking.
"Sory" Mulder said. Mulder didnt notice Blevins had a hard on because he was sitting down. So was Mulders boss, Walter Skinner, and Scully, but she didn't (of course!!) have a hard on. Because that would be impossible! But she wished she could. She was so wet, though, that her nylons were soaked so bad her shoes would've squeaked if she got up and walked over to Mulder and stuck her tongue down his throat, which she wanted to do, because she loved him. She hoped noone would ask her to walk, or they'd squeak, and she'd be REALLY embarrassed then.
"I dont want to hear your apologies, Agent Mulder, because you are in a lot of trouble," Blevins, the Director, yelled angrily at Mulder, but he still kept his voice not too loud. "You killed that guy who was buging your apartment, and tried to cover it up, and now you need to be reprimanded."
Blevins had a big smile on his face when he said that, and Mulder looked even more scarred. But he kind of liked the idea. He had seen stuff like this Discipline Sex at Work in his porn movies he kept in the drawer in the X-Files office, and some at his apartment. Mulder hid a grin and he got real hard, too. So everyone was real hard, exept for his partner, Dana Scully, who was moist in her secret womanly place and it soaked through her black lace panties, all the way down into her shoes. And the pinch-faced-looking lady, who wasn't wet, because she was old. But she still liked to watch. Old ladies can still like to watch, and sometimes do it, also. I really dont know why she was there because she never said anything. She just watched. But that made it kinda kinky, and it made everyone even hotter, if that was possible!!
Assistant Director Walter Sergei (because thats his middle name, it sounds like "Sir-gay", isnt that weird?) Skinner was also thinking all kinds of kinky thoughts in his bald head when Blevins said that. His throbbing rod of manhood felt like it was gonna explode if it didnt get into Mulder real quick.
After Blevins said he would be reprimanded, everyone stood up out of their chairs at the table. Mulder swallowed hard when he saw the huge bulges in his bosses pants (because Blevins was still sort of his boss, too). If Scully had turned around, he would see the big wet spot on the back of her otherwise immaculate skirt, too. But she didnt turn around. Her front was a bit damp, though.
"Oh, my God, what am I in for here?!!!" Mulder thought to himself, swallowing hard again and feeling his own erection getting big. He was trying not to smile, because he really was excited about the whole idea. Whatever it was.
"Mulder," said Skinner, who obviously had the biggest dick Mulder had ever seen, even through the pants which covered it. It was really huge. It made Mulder a bit nervous, thinking about it being inside him, even thought they had slept together several times before, but it always scarred him a little. But it also made him really, really want it in him. "As your boss, I suggest you take whats coming to you." He smiled, too, as he said it.
"Okay, do what you will. You cant keep me from uncovering The Truth!" Mulder forgot that they couldnt see that he said "The Truth" like that, with capital T's.
"The Truth, Agent Mulder?" Blevins said, saying it with capital T's, too. "I'll show you The Truth, if thats what you want!"
Then Blevins wiped open his fly, showing his stiff and throbbing and red prick. Mulder almost fainted, he was so surprised. Blevins then morphed into a really big guy, not the Schwartzenalien, but a guy just as big. He kind of looked like Fabio, exept with short hair.
Scully morphed, too, into Krycheck. He still had his arm, though. Because that didn't really happen! But Krycheck did look funny wearing Scullys outfit. So he wiped out a leather jacket and tight jeans and T-shirt he remembered to stash in Scullys briefcase back when he had been pretending to be Scully, and put them on. Because he really didnt want to stand there in a skirt.
The pinch-faced-looking lady morphed into X, even though she wasnt black. But Skinner stayed the same.
"That was some other guy who got killed in your hallway and wrote SRSG in blood, Mulder," X said to Mulder, who looked pretty surprised right now. "Ive always been a morphing alien, you just were too much of a schoolboy to know about it!"
Although he pretended to look mad, Mulder kind of liked being called a schoolboy. It made him even hotter, imagining himself in short pants. Thats what Skinner was thinking as he looked lustily at Mulder, how great Mulder would look in short pants after he, too, heard what X said about Mulder being a schoolboy. Krycheck, too, was imagining Mulder in short pants and getting really hard, too, because now he had a penis because he was no longer Scully, who didnt have one (of course!).
At the mention of SRSG, Marita showed up, exept she was about to morph into Mulders father, who was dead. But not really, I guess, just like X wasnt really dead anymore. When she did morph into his father, she said, "Fox, my son, I was always a woman! You just were too careless to notice! Thats why you lost your sister! You were a careless boy when you were a little kid, and I and your mother always hated you for it!"
At that, Mulder felt really bad, and his penis went down a little (but not all the way). "Bummer, my penis went down a little" Mulder thought to himself, so no body could hear. After all, it was pretty embarrassing. But they all could see that his penis had gone down, even through his pants, which were always loose so you could see if he was hard or not. So they were all pretty pissed at Marita (who now looked like Mulders father, Mr. Mulder) for saying that and making Mulders penis go down a little.
So then the big short-haired Fabio-looking alien, who had been Blevins but Blevins wouldn't be strong enough to do this, threw Marita (who looked like Mulders father, but who was just faking being Mulders father because he really, truly was dead, only Krycheck wasnt really the one who had killed him) out the window. There was a window in the room, you see. Good thing it was open, even though it was cold outside.
So everyone was very happy about the Fabio-looking alien throwing Marita out the window, especially Mulder, who would have still felt bad if the Fabio- looking alien had thrown his father out the window for real. Even though he used to beat him, because Mulder still loved him and wouldnt have wanted to see him thrown out any window, no matter how mean and nasty he had been to Mulder when Mulder was a kid.
"Now, where were we?" Skinner, who wasnt an alien, said as he approached Mulder. "Oh, yeah, we were going to reprimand Mulder for killing the guy who was buging his apartment, (even though the guy really deserved it because buging apartments is illegal if you dont have permission!!!)" he added.
Mulder swallowed hard as all the people in the room closed in on him. He got hard again, too, harder than he ever had been in his whole life! He really liked this kind of stuff, you see, but he had only done it in fantasy, not for real. Until now, that is!! He hoped.
So they all took turns having sex with him on the table, because thats what they really meant by that they were going to reprimand Mulder for killing the guy who was buging his apartment. They all had a great time, too, especially Mulder, even though he was hiding how much fun he had with each of them. They had to take Mulders pants off first, of course.
Then it turned out that it was really Feb 14th, (not back when the season began, which was November, when my birthday is) which means it was Valentines Day, and Skinner had arranged it all because he and Mulder had been lovers for a long time, and Skinner knew he would really like it. You see, Mulder had once gotten pretty drunk and told him about his fantasies to have everyone on the show, practically, do it to him on the big table they sat at when they had meetings.
Luckily, Skinner knew some morphing aliens pretty well, and they helped him out with the surprise.
But at the last minute Skinner thought it would be sick to include Mulders father, even if it was only an alien looking like Mulders father, so he told the Fabio alien to throw him out the window. He wasnt hurt, though, because morphing aliens can fall out of buildings without really being hurt. Like in the one with Mulders sister, where she was a clone.
THE END!! (Surprised, huh?)
Write me!!! Tell me that you all want me to write a sequel, because I have lots of cool ideas!!!
E-mail Griffie-Baby!!!!
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